Advantages: As shown in photo, already an object of intense veneration for thousands. Probably world's favorite chimney at the moment. Symbolizes Manichaean absolutes of black and white in smoke form. With no cardinals or pope in evidence, chimney is sole means of communication with church hierarchs. Is, in effect, God's chimney, emanating from God's pot-bellied stove. Can you sah-mell what the Lord is cooooo-kin'?
Disadvantages: Producing desired color of smoke still not an exact science. Despite use of smoke bombs, chemicals, army flares, and other methods, the dreaded "gray smoke" could cause riotous confusion among the faithful. Might be replaced by sixteenth-century procedure of lighting fire in ignition hole of a gun in the Sistine Chapel, but chapel regrettably gun-free these days.
Place in history: Will be dismantled after conclave and stored in Vatican basement, until needed for summertime barbeque all'Italiana.
No pyros among the chimney tenders? Ah, they should have brought one in. And for BBQ, the rule on smoke is: "Smoke's white? Fire's all right. Smoke's black? Add some draft." Or they could toss in some Coleman fuel and have an actual fireball come out of the chimney!
JH
Posted by: JMH | April 21, 2005 at 01:43 PM
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Posted by: flue liner | September 30, 2009 at 12:07 PM